the lady who cried hemorrhoid

at first i thought she was just crazy. she came in complaining of hemorrhoid pain which everyone just laughed at. she wouldn't sit down, refused even, while in triage. she tried my patience because we all just thought she was making a big deal, which she probably was a little.
once brought back to the room she asked the charge nurse every five minutes for pain meds. she asked the registration lady twice. she wouldn't stop, she was in pain and wanted EVERYONE in the ER to know it.
she went to the door and cried out for her husband in the most pitiful sounding voice ever. her son, who was around 6 or seven heard his mother's cry from the lobby and freaked out, he wanted to see her and was crying at the top of his lungs "i need to see her, i need to see her" which really upset me.
how are you going to freak your own kids out? seriously, when you're in pain, that bad, you don't even feel like yelling. you have so much pain, even yelling hurts you. i should have known she was an exaggerator when i asked her about her pain level between one and ten and she said fifteen (the pain scale STOPS at ten...get it through your thick skulls people).
i finally got sick of her outburst that i told her she needed to try and relax, needed to try deep breathing. i started an IV and told her the doctor would be in soon and then i reminded her the hospital was a place of business and that she needed to try to not yell.
bad idea.
she got 10 kinds of upset and told me i was a rude little witch. she went on and on about how rude i was, how she was the director of wound care at a hospital. then the doctor came to my rescue and stood up for me and he ordered pain meds to shut her up.
i walked back in with the pain meds (strong ones) and told her i was sorry, that i didn't want to upset her but just remind her that getting anxious and upset would only make the problem worse and she apologized profusely for her behavior. we were both in the wrong. but seriously...she was overdoing it just a tad.
in the end she was admitted because she needed surgery to correct her hemorrhoids, apparently they were really bad.
lesson from the story: don't push when you're on the toilet because it causes hemorrhoids= painful poops!